Julie DeLucca

Unleashing A Confident You Through Simple Habits With Julie DeLucca

Bringing a business to another level does not always require overcomplicated strategies. Sometimes, all you have to do is tweak your daily routine and start building simple habits. Sam Reeve and the PSF team talks with Julie DeLucca about creating healthy habits that lead to better behavior and a much better business. She shares some productivity hacks about water consumption, email management, calendar management, and people management. Julie also explains how women can build confidence in a market full of economic pressures by embracing core values, being clear with sales goals, and nurturing relationships with others.

Unleashing A Confident You Through Simple Habits With Julie DeLucca

We have a very special guest with us, which we are going to be talking about building confidence with those simple habits. I’m very excited to get into this conversation because, with the chaos of life, it’s always good to ensure that we have those rituals that we rely on. I know that Julie is going to take us through a wonderful path here. Before we get started, here is a little bit about the show. We are here as a host of experts to provide a little bit more clarity specifically for those companies that are out there that are developing their practices. We are here to elevate the overall practice, talent, rewards management, and so forth.

We have a variety of people on as a host. My name is Sam Reeve, and I’m the CEO of CompTeam. We also have Char Miller. She has a depth of experience in HR. She’s also a career coach and has a variety of her own businesses that she operates. She’s an expert in managing people and developing cohesive teams. Sumit Singla is out of India. He is an expert on people’s strategies and has a long pedigree of working with some pretty significant consulting companies. He works with his own company in India and helps out at CompTeam. We appreciate his expertise and his knowledge there.

We have Howard Binysh. A colleague of mine from a long time ago at Barclays Bank. A lot of expertise in systems and development. He is a comp expert. A lot of knowledge there to automate our busy things in the comp department and get off of spreadsheets. We have Wendy Gram. She is a TMA practitioner. She’s an expert there.

A lot of people on the call here are TMA practitioners, such as Char, Sumit, and myself. It’s a tool to help you get to know your people better and improve communications. Wendy is also a trainer and an expert. In addition to being a trainer, she’s an expert in talent management. I’m happy to have Wendy on.

Starting with a quick introduction to our expert contributor, Julie. She’s written the book the Confident You, as she describes herself as an extrovert. That started back when you entered the pandemic. You got into podcasting, which is a way to help yourself from not going crazy when we are all confined to our own spaces for a couple of years ago. You have the podcast of Casa DeConfidence. You also advise people on how to be more confident in themselves through a lot of those habits. You are a Tiny Habits coach and certified. Is that right?

That’s correct.

One thing that I would love to dive into a little bit here is to understand a little bit more about how you got to do what you are doing now and how you help people.

Thank you for having me. This is a fun conversation. As you said, I’m an extrovert. Anytime that I have the opportunity to talk with other incredible individuals, I have a good day. I started my career as a teacher, and then soon enough, I learned that I love teaching and being able to serve others but at the same time, I wanted a little more.

I transitioned to working for an educational company and grew through the ranks of the educational company. They are based out of New Jersey. They are a national company, and I happened to be very successful in the organization. As I grew through the ranks, I saw that I had a knack not only for training and I was being groomed to move into the training department. From that, I realized that I also loved business development and creating relationships.

This company I’m lucky enough that I have worked for invested in their people. As you were coming into the corporate and executive environment, they cross-trained you in sales, business development, marketing, and operations. I had a great background in that and went to that school of life working for this company. I was soon recruited by another organization that was looking to take its operations out of New York City to the national level.

As I had experience in already operating over 150 contracts nationwide for the other organization, it was easy for me to come in and help them transition and build that. I worked with that company for twelve years. We also had a not-for-profit attached, so I had some great experience serving on the board and the executive team for the not-for-profit at different levels.

Eventually, I knew that I wanted to do something for myself and go off on my own in the, and also distant future. I had been speaking at conferences and educational conferences around the country, and the pandemic happened. I already had my first certification in Cognitive Behavioral Techniques but mainly I did that for me.

I wanted to improve. I wanted to change and be able to shift my mindset. I thought maybe someday this is going to help me but also, it’s going to help me in creating some of the training and things that I do now for this organization. Little did I know that when the pandemic hit, when you are in the organization working with school districts, and the school districts shut down, basically, your company is in great peril. A couple of us on the executive team was offered a separation package.

Although it was difficult, it was a morning period because I had been with the company for so long. The founder of the company and I were great friend mentors. I knew that it was the right thing for me to go off on my own, and I knew immediately that I wanted to go in and do my own thing. I didn’t know necessarily if it was going to be consulting or coaching but then I realized that I had a big passion for working with women.

One of the biggest things that I heard throughout my career anywhere in that corporate ladder climb was, “I wish I were as confident as you. I wish I could do XYZ that you are doing.” I kept thinking, “There is a level of confidence but I work at it.” I also have clear habits that I revert back to and automate, and that helps me keep going.

When you don’t feel the motivation to do certain things or life knocks you down, if you have the right level of habits, it becomes automation that you can continue to move forward. Consistent action gets you traction. That’s how I started Go Confidently Services, which primarily is working with individuals who are starting or growing a business and creating the business that is not only going to be successful but is able to allow them the freedom and the ability to reach what they want their life to be when it comes to running their business.

When life knocks you down or you feel unmotivated, you can still move forward if you have the right level of habits. Click To Tweet

I leverage all of the skills that I have in the past and bring in the new skills that I have gained as a coach and certifications. Tiny Habits is something that I wanted to learn for myself, to continue to hone my skills because we have read all the different books on habits. For one thing or another, it wasn’t clicking until Tiny Habits came about, and then all of a sudden, I realized, “This makes sense.”

We change when we feel good and can create an automation that it’s so easy and crazy that you are not relying on motivation to do the work. That’s how my journey started, and I have been doing this for several years. I’m thrilled, and this is such a wonderful adventure that I am so grateful every day for having the ability to work with amazing individuals and do what I do.

I would love to hear a little bit more about the Tiny Habits method and how you use that to help people. Where does that typically start when you are we are looking to advise people on this?

To give you a background, and again, there are many books on habits but Tiny Habits was written by Dr. BJ Fogg, and he is the Founder of the Behavioral Lab at Stanford University. He is one of the world’s leading researchers when it comes to behavior design. One of the research and things that he has discovered is that we change when we feel good, number one.

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything

Number two is to create a habit. You need to make sure that you are pairing it with an anchor moment. There has to be a prompt. As humans, we like to have automation. Our brain doesn’t like to work. Our brain likes to automate everything. To design new behavior, you have to find the areas in your life or your day that you already have automated and then pair your new desired behavior to that automation.

We create what we call Tiny Habit recipes. The way that Tiny Habit recipes work is when I, which is your anchor moment, will create behavior, and last, you celebrate. I’m going to touch a little bit on each of these and how I help with this framework for my clients. For instance, for me, as an entrepreneur, being healthy and energetic is very important.

One of the first things that contribute to me having a great mindset, being energized, and feeling alert is making sure that I’m taking care of myself physically. That means drinking water. Water is a great thing that we probably don’t drink enough of. One of my automation in drinking water is that I try to get 120 ounces of water a day. That’s a daunting number. If I woke up in the morning and said, “I’m going to drink 120 ounces of water,” the first thought was, “That’s a lot. I don’t know if I could do it.”

However, I am not going for my big bottle of water. I am going for a win. I find the time in my day in which there’s already automation built in. I have three dogs. Three little tiny pups, the first squad, and they need to be let out. In the morning, when I let my dogs out, that’s my anchor moment. When I let my dogs out, I am so lucky that the sink where I fill up my water bottle is right there.

I fill up my water bottle. That’s the desired behavior. I fill up my water bottle, and then I celebrate. The celebration is the part that is so important because research says that our brain changes when it feels good. When I celebrate, it’s not this big dance. Many clients feel very uncomfortable. It’s like, “I don’t know how to celebrate.”

Give yourself a thumbs up or smile and say, “Good job. You did it.” Very tiny something but acknowledging your win says to your brain, “We got to do this again. I like this feeling.” When I celebrate that my water bottle is full, I’m off to a great start and have already won. Whether or not I drink the entire bottle of water, I have already moved and begun the momentum.

Once the bottle is full, I take a couple of sips or some water. My other behavior is that if you are drinking water, you are going to have to go to the restroom. My anchor moment is when I go to the restroom. After I come out, I drink some water, and it keeps pairing up. I am never going for the entire big shebang. I’m going for the tiny little behavior that moves me forward and celebrating.

That is what allows me to create that behavior. That framework, when working with clients, I identify specifically where it is that maybe they need some of the better habits to be more productive, to be successful at accomplishing tasks or whatever it might be. We design tiny habit recipes that allow them to move forward in their business and accomplish the goals that they want.

What are you finding in the big issues with women now where they need help? Before you answer that, you are right about water consumption. It’s crazy. It’s simple but it’s one of the areas that people often neglected. They wonder why, “Why do I feel so tired all the time? Why am I having a hard time maintaining my weight?” It’s the key to so many things in happiness, as you said it.

I tell my husband before we move on. Every time that he has a headache or an ache and pain, my typical answer to him is, “Did you drink some water?” It’s my logical answer and fixes it all.

Let’s get to the issues of what women are looking for. What are the main issues that women are experiencing now in the context of what we have gotten out of the pandemic? We are moving back in. We are being faced with a lot of economic pressures and so forth. There is a lot of pressure and stress. What are women dealing with now? What are the main things you are helping them with?

Many of my clients are either starting a business or have a business, and they are not making consistent income from month to month. One of the things that I help them with is being able to one identify. If they don’t have a business and they have an idea, what is it that they need to do? Is it an idea that it’s going to fly?

Number two, are there client people willing to pay for this? Create the 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 roadmaps to being able to accomplish. This means being able to do some of the things that maybe are hard for you. I will take someone, for instance. I have a client who was in the middle of the pandemic. She was a trainer. She worked at a gym but said, “I want to train people, and I don’t want people to tell me how to do it and when to do it. I’m very highly qualified. I’m certified in so many different areas.”

She decided that she was going to launch a business in her home. She didn’t know anything about marketing. She didn’t know anything about how to price herself. She didn’t know anything about the permits or all the things that needed to happen. What we needed to do was create a consistent plan of attack for all the things that she needed to accomplish.

I taught her Tiny Habits. In the morning, when I come to my desk, I’m going to open my calendar. That was her main tiny habit going for was opening her calendar. At the beginning of the week, I also taught her about creating priorities, the things that moved her forward. Not a to-do list that was an endless task but aligning.

“Now, I need to speak to someone in the permitting office for my town. I need to go ahead and follow up with that.” Whatever it is, we set up a framework that allowed her to do that. For some of my clients are building the infrastructure for a business from soup to nuts. For other clients, maybe they already have a business. Their coaches or consultants, maybe they have a product. For them, this comes to what I call the O Shiny syndrome, which many of us can suffer from.

We set out with great intentions for the day and things that we have to work on for our business. Somehow at the end of the day, we end up getting sidetracked by email or by notifications. Something came up and like, “I’m going to go look into Google and see what that says. I need to work on my marketing,” but rather than working on your marketing plan, you are going to go figure out, “What should I be posting?” It doesn’t keep you on the task.

A lot of time is identifying what are the stumbling blocks for my clients. As an educator in me, we create a very individualized plan for them. Something targeted that helps them be able to move their business forward. I can teach my clients about marketing. I can teach them about sales. We talk about all these different things within their coaching but are seeing where the gaps are for them and being able to prioritize and using the Tiny Habits method to then prioritize the things that they need to start creating habits for.

Sometimes a productivity hack that I teach my clients is in the morning if you are going to check email. You open your email, and then you scan for all of the important emails rather than trying to look at who’s having a sale or what new thing is happening in your inbox you are just scanning for. After you scan all your emails for the most important things, you celebrate.

Once you see what’s most important, the next framework is that you can answer one email only if it’s going to take you less than three minutes. If not, that’s going to move to a priority list that goes into your processing time during the day. That’s a time that we schedule that is already built into your calendar. You are using email in a way that it’s serving you as opposed to you reacting to somebody else’s priorities and needs. This helps to keep you on track with the things that you should be doing.

I want to ask a question on email because this is something that haunts me a lot. I know that it probably haunts a lot of leaders out there as the amount that we get in on a daily basis. Trying to be as responsive as possible to people. This is a big area for a lot of us. Are there certain types of platforms that you see your clients use or that you recommend that are best for email management and getting things done?

One of the biggest things that I do is that our inboxes are crowded with a lot of different things. I use the Google platform for all of my business, and one of the things that you can do in Google is you can set up rules. You can even do it within Outlook in which emails that you are getting, maybe the invoice from XYZ or you are getting your notification for this new thing. You can create folders and have these emails that crowd your inbox with hundreds of emails. Go directly into these folders, and when you are ready to manage maybe your finances, and you need all the invoices, then you go into that folder and pull them up.

The other thing too as well is biggest thing that we don’t utilize is the unsubscribe button. There are a lot of times that we sign up for things, and then we feel bad. I have an email list, and my most important thing is to grow my email list because your email list is the lifeline of your business. However, if it’s not serving you, if it’s not aligned with you at the moment, and if it’s a distraction, unsubscribe.

It’s okay. You can subscribe again. They won’t be mad at you. If anything, they will be happy that you are in subscribing if you are not the right customer for them. Little tips and tools like that are key but the other thing too is, and this is where a lot of women lose confidence. This is where I see a lot of the work and mindset.

When you allow yourself to get distracted and end up not being on task with the things that your ideal calendar should look like. At the end of the day, you beat yourself up because you’ve sabotaged yourself, judged yourself, and then it’s very difficult to get moving. It’s like what we talked about. Our brain changes or makes positive traction forward when it feels good.

When you are beating yourself up, when you are sabotaging, when you allow all your different saboteurs, whether it be the people pleaser or whether it be the judge or the high achiever, to tell you, “You are not achieving as well as you should. You could never measure up,” then you are not going to be doing the work forward that you need to.

When you are self-sabotaging due to trying to please people or become a high achiever, you cannot move forward doing what you want. Click To Tweet

You mentioned celebration and so forth but I would like to hear from Char. I know that you are juggling so much. It seems like you are so busy. You have all these different businesses and things that are going on. You are coaching and so forth. How do you handle it all?

Delegation. I would say that’s the primary word. It does become very overwhelming. Managing employees and multiple business ventures. One of my things every morning I wake up as I’m trying to get my water and my coffee, more importantly, or less importantly is taking a bite of that gorilla for the day. Think about that one thing, that one gorilla that you need to knock off your priority list first, and then before you tackle all the other minute tasks and challenges, is important.

I do go back to working with your team and with your talent and capitalizing on the talent of your team. One short example is that we have an executive assistant. Rather than sitting on hold with a phone company for two and a half hours, and I won’t say which one. That’s a task that the executive assistant can help you with, and she or he can multitask as they are doing that instead of the CEO or the Chief HR Officer sitting on hold for 2 or 3 hours leveraging those resources.

That’s one way we have been able to tackle all. It’s very much a people management and strategy process. That’s why I love doing these forums because I learn how to leverage those resources. That’s one of the many things. We became a multimillion-dollar company by doing those very things. I have to tell you, Julie. Confidence, yes. Confidence to get through all of this, when you are an entrepreneur, it’s very risky, and you have to have the confidence to not only lead your people but to take those risks and do those challenging activities.

I totally agree with you, and thank you so much for talking about delegation because this is one of the biggest things that is a challenge for many. I don’t want to generalize, but in my experience, it has been women. I work predominantly with women but I do have some male clients. If I tell a male client, “You need to hire.” I tell a female client that the male client will hire them right away and start to delegate where a female will like, “I don’t know. What if they don’t do it?” Part of the process of empowering them to be able to delegate.

When they start to create processes for their business, one of the first things that we do is create those SOPs for themselves, and people think, “I’m an entrepreneur. I’m a solopreneur. Why would I need these standard operating procedures?” When you are ready to delegate because there are only certain things that you can do as a CEO of your business.

If you can start to then say, “I created a process for that.” Now I can turn this over to my person, then it allows you to do those activities that only you as a CEO can do, and that’s key. Writing an email, sending an email out, checking your inbox or calendaring things is great but that’s not a high-value task as it is maybe networking, speaking to a potential client, or pitching an organization that you can be bring value to.

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Simple Habits: If you can delegate non-high-value tasks to others, like writing emails or sorting out your calendar, you can finally do activities only a CEO can do.


That’s very powerful what you mentioned as far as looking at and documenting what you are doing from day to day. I will take this a little step further. I like to document the things that I don’t like to do. If I document the things I don’t like to do, then I can pass those off to somebody that does like doing that activity. As they like doing it, they will probably do it better than I do.

I am lucky enough. Part of Go Confidently Services includes having a podcast, and I love talking on the podcast but if it were up to me to edit and do any of the technical stuff, we wouldn’t have a podcast. Do what you do best, delegate the rest. I have a wonderful producer, my husband, who does all of the work and loves it. He did sound in college. That’s not what he does for a living but he gets to do something that he’s passionate and good at, and it’s a gift.

You have the best podcast voice I have ever heard. It’s so calming.

The other thing, and I know that Howard is a big fan of this too. As we are moving forward, and especially now, there has been so much new software that’s coming out. One of the things that we constantly have to challenge ourselves is that what are the areas that can be automated or maybe done better with software pieces. Howard, you come into that a lot.

I’m always looking at, “How can I do things better, smarter, and more efficiently?” Sometimes we get so used to, “I have always done it this way,” that we seem reluctant or even scared to try and do things a little bit differently. Open your mind and look at the possibilities and say, “Maybe the way I’m doing it is not the best.”

Howard, I have to tell you that there are many entrepreneurs that are so reluctant to utilize new technology but technology is a life saver, a time saver, and is one of the biggest tools that you can have. If you don’t have human capital, technology is also one of the best tools that you can have in your corner.

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Simple Habits: Many entrepreneurs are reluctant to utilize new technology. Nevertheless, technology is one of the biggest tools you can have if you don’t have human capital.


A lot of those go great things that are out there. Things I suffer from, and thank God I have Sumit here because Sumit is such a wonderful writer. I’m terrible at writing and getting these things. When I get it down on paper, it’s often in this editing and a good spell checker. Those are pieces that are a way that we need to leverage and embrace technology overall, so it can help us.

What other things are you seeing, Julie, as far as issues that women need to be thinking about and the leadership role? Now, often, communication, communicating effectively, showing yourself in a great way with your people, your clients, and so forth is a big issue. What are you seeing there as far as women’s issues in that area?

A lot of women are always going to come up with a story, and this is where I leverage some of my other training in Cognitive Behavioral Techniques. The story that typical women say to themselves is, “I am not a very good salesperson.” Right off the bat, I know that a lot of women are going to be reluctant to enter into a conversation with someone because they are viewing themselves as that picture in their mind of what a salesperson is like pushy, and maybe we are going back to the stereotype of the used car salesperson.

One of the things that I would like to have them do is be able to rewrite some of those beliefs because, number one, sales is about relationships. At least in my experience, if someone needs something you offer, they are going to pay for something you are offering and if you have something of value. It’s about creating the relationship, nurturing the relationship, understanding, and getting into the framework in which you know what your people need and want from you. It’s creating that value and then saying, “You are struggling.”

For instance, my client Amanda. She didn’t have a hard time enrolling people. “You have pandemic weight. You have been sedentary. That’s terrible. You don’t want to go back to a big gym. I have a great answer for you. I am a certified trainer that can teach you in a very individualized way. How to be able to start to feel stronger, and how to leverage. It could be at your own time, and it’s not too far from you.”

There’s a solution. She’s not selling and going for the hard sale on something that people already need and value. Helping women get past that thought sometimes allows them to be then able to as they go about with speaking, networking, talking to people about what they do, and then testing whether or not there is a market for what they are doing is also very important.

I have women that start off like, “I’m going to do this. This is what I want to do.” Yet nobody is looking for that. The more that you are out there and finding out what the market requires and then being intentional about creating your offers, you can easily say to someone, “Yes, I do that. I can help you with that.” You are doing it out of that relationship. You are not assuming that you are pushing someone to do something that they don’t need or want.

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Simple Habits: Be intentional with what you can offer so you can do something for others out of your relationship instead of pushing them around.


That’s something that’s very key. For many of us, we need to be able to build our confidence by seeing the results of what we are doing. We are feeling good. “I told someone that I can help them with XYZ. That’s what they need. I know I can help them.” They then say, “Yes.” You are going to feel good about doing it again. When someone says, “Sorry, it’s not for me.” You don’t feel like, “What did I do wrong?” “No, it’s okay. Somebody else needs me. Great. This person has allowed me to have the scope then to have time for somebody else.” That’s a little bit of how people are building their confidence, and my clients work through those issues and challenges.

As far as the confidence piece is huge. I have been trying to work on that through practice and doing the same things over and over again, trying to get better and so forth. What are some of the steps that you highlight in your book as far as where people should be addressed first and how they should think about building their confidence in a Tiny Habits way?

One of the things that I wanted to share with the individuals reading my book is the things that have worked with me and the simple habits that I have created in my life to help me achieve a new level of success. I was so fortunate that I had some incredible individuals be a part of my life. Be part of the people that poured into me. I wanted to share the stories of those individuals and what are the examples that I saw in their lives. What are the things that they did for themselves to reach a level of success? What are the things that they taught me, and then how have I made them my own?

The book was set up with ten different chapters, and you can read them in order or go and choose the one that makes the most sense for you. At the end of the chapter because again, the teacher in me is, I do, we do, and then you do. I want you to explore what does that mean for you and then be able to write and create that little plan for yourself.

The biggest thing when it comes to confidence, and Sam, you were talking about this. The more you are doing something. You are building confidence. I want to give the analogy of learning to swim. I didn’t learn to swim until I was fourteen but I liked water. I happened to jump many times when I was little into the deep end of the pool, and I had to be rescued right away.

When it came to, again, learning to swim, I would jump to the deep end of the pool and couldn’t do it, and I didn’t feel very confident we came to racing. What I started to do is start small again, as we talked about in Tiny Habits. The first thing that you do when you are learning to swim, the first thing is I started to blow bubbles and, “I could do that. I can breathe underwater.” I then started to do the little doggy paddle. When I started to do the doggy paddle, I could breathe and do the doggy paddle. Once I started to maybe learn to stroke and do my little movement, I could move to the deeper end of the pool.

The more that you are creating the record of effectiveness for yourself, the evidence that you can do it, the better you are going to be at being able to build your confidence that you can go to the deep end of the pool. As you are starting out, maybe you have a new role in your organization, and this is not something that 100% you have the confidence that you can do this job, then what I want you to do is practice. Remember that even if you fail at something in the process of doing this, failure is your first step in learning. Without that first step, we are not going to know how to do it better, change or course correct this something that we need.

Always consider failure as your first step in learning. Without it, you may never know how to do things better. Click To Tweet

I look at women even in Corporate America and have seen these many times. We used to advertise for different positions. 9 times out of 10, I would have someone in my organization who maybe was a female, highly qualified. I thought that I would be the right fit for this brand-new position, this new role. They wouldn’t apply for the role because they would say, “Julie, I don’t think I can do this,” even if they met 80% to 90% of that role.

Whereas I would get people who apply to the role who I would never even think of having them in that short list because they weren’t quite a fit but many males tend to feel a little more confident like, “I can learn that.” There’s nothing wrong because when we are putting out a role or a new job posting, it’s a wishlist of everything that role is going to have.

We understand that there’s going to be a learning curve. There’s going to be an ability for people to acclimate, make the world their own, and move forward. Be willing to step into something new knowing that you are not going to be 100% good at it. Very rarely does that happen? Natural ability is great but the majority of us take practice. It takes that consistent showing up in allowing ourselves to give ourselves the next best time and moment to work at it.

That’s the piece is that we need to continually push our boundaries. Work up against those and push our boundaries out. What I like to think about is that the further we push our boundaries out, the more comfortable we are at our core because we become much more adept at that. Sumit, as far as thinking about developing confidence and so forth, what do you see in your culture and the cultures that you work with as far as ways that people are struggling and help build their confidence up?

One element to confidence is that we lay too much emphasis on speaking the English language and what we consider is the right way. You will see a lot of people who have confidence issues because they believe their communication isn’t quite up to the mark. Coaches and managers are trying to change this view saying, “If you are understandable, it’s perfectly fine because you don’t necessarily need an American, British or any other accent. As long as the other person can understand you, that’s perfectly okay.” You need to have the right ideas and be able to convey them. That’s about it.

That’s one. The second is creating information in public. Whether it’s in the written medium or whether it’s speaking up in meetings, more often is something that people shy away from. If you consider the written medium like LinkedIn, there are estimates that say only about 1% of the people are writing or creating, and the others are sitting there thinking, “What if I look like an idiot if I post something and what if people laugh at me?”

Similarly, even in meetings, a lot of people second-guess themselves and wonder if they ask a stupid question or an offensive question. That’s the other thing about the offense. Specifically in Asian and Indian cultures, a manager or leader is seen as somebody who’s somehow above you on some kind of pedestal. Asking them an uncomfortable question or asking them a question can be very intimidating to people, and you would need a lot of confidence to maybe question their authority or be okay with being seen as questioning authority. Those are some of the confidence things that we struggle with.

A quick story. I was talking to a gentleman from Saudi Arabia, and his English was pretty rough. I’m sure that he probably thought I was speaking a little fast but the important thing that I was trying to understand during that part of our dialogue together is that we are trying to come about a shared goal. Having that realization is important. I’m trying to explain to him a particular concept, and he’s trying to listen to learn more about that concept.

In partnering together with him, we made it through the call, and it was quite successful. That’s part of the thing that we need to think about and anything that we do if we are venturing out, and maybe it’s public speaking or whatever. There’s a person that is speaking and listening, and we are there for a shared goal. Understanding that is key to working through the difficulty of being uncomfortable being lacking that confidence. Julie, in your experience with public speaking, because that’s a huge thing, how can we get more confident here in these areas? Is this a topic that often comes up with you?

As a production of Casa DeConfidence productions, we have expanded to Global Network Radio, and we have several women who are joining our network because they have a wonderful message and want to put it out there. It’s intimidating to be able to put yourself out there mainly because, as we know, our biggest need when we revisit Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is to belong. Sometimes by putting ourselves out there, we are risking that we don’t belong and that we are not going to be accepted.

I can tell you that one of the things that I encourage them to do is that not everyone is going to be your right listener but someone out there needs the message that you have. If you are clear on who you are and we go back to personal brand, this is something that I’m big on when it comes to working with individuals. Be very clear on what your brand is. Be clear on what you stand for, what you offer, and your strengths.

Whether you have a business or you are in Corporate America, it’s important to know what your personal brand is. Once you do that and your brand has to have your values included there. When it comes to speaking, and you know what you do, what you offer, who you are, who you offer it to, and you are clear with your values. Being able to get in a forum like this to talk about what you do, who you do it for, and what your message is, it’s going to come a little easier as if you are speaking about something that I don’t know.

If I were to get in here and talk about how to rotate or change your brakes, I have no idea. I could probably tell you that you are going to have to take the wheels off your car. I don’t even know would the rotors go or what that means, or if there’s brake fluid and where would that go. I could probably make it up. That’s the extrovert, seven enneagrams in me or the DI, and the DiSC. Whatever you want to talk.

However, ask me about habits. Talk to me about things that are familial and align with what’s important to me. One of my biggest values for my organization and me as a person is service. That’s first and foremost when it comes to my values and something that anybody who’s working with me I am going to serve and support you. Leadership growth. That’s also part of my value system. When it comes to speaking on these topics, it’s going to come easy.

That’s what I encourage if you are looking to create a platform and put yourself out there. Speaking at a meeting, it’s intimidating, especially if you haven’t done it a lot, and this goes back to practicing. It goes back to doing it for the first time. Be okay with it if you have a question. If someone is discussing something and, “That’s not going to work. I know for sure,” then be okay with raising your hand.

It’s because you will be seen as the person who, 1) Is courageous enough to say something and, 2) May have the solution that the group is looking for. Start small or start tiny. Maybe you say, “I have a question or I have a thought,” and being able to start small and you will be able to start it. That’s the beauty of Tiny Habits. Tiny Habits are like plants. They grow the more that you use them. If planted in the right place, they can expand.

Tiny habits grow the more you use them. If planted in the right place, they can expand. Click To Tweet

There are a lot of people out there who have questions and want to know more about the Tiny Habits process and leverage your experience in that Cognitive Behavioral approach that you have. How can people get a hold of you and learn more?

You can find everything you need on my website that’s If you want to maybe learn a little bit about Tiny Habits, the Tiny Habits Academy runs a five-day free challenge, and we can teach you Tiny Habits in five minutes a day for a week. It’s not a big investment but it’s a big payoff. If you are interested in doing that, you can go to, and there is a sign-up for that.

On those quick links, you can also see some of the different ways in which you might be able to connect with me. Typically, what I do is I have conversations with you to see and clarify whether or not I’m the right fit. I do have clients that are not specifically entrepreneurs that are maybe looking to leverage their career as well.

We work through using Tiny Habits and also the mindset to be able to move to the next level. I am working toward my ICF certification and Positive Intelligence coaching as well because I don’t do anything that I am not my best client for. That has been amazing to be able to understand what are the different things that sabotage is and how we can overcome sabotaging thoughts and behaviors. We have to create more expansion and be able to have that capacity to be more productive and in tune with everything that is going on in life, whether it be for our personal, our business or our career.

I have taken that Positive Intelligence training before. That was a lot of fun.

It’s a lot of fun. I’m doing the whole year of training now, so it’s super exciting, insightful, and excellent. I highly recommend it.

It has been wonderful talking to you, Julie. Thank you for sharing all this great knowledge that we have here about being better and becoming more confident. Where can people find your book?

It’s on Amazon. It’s Confident You or You can also find it there as well.

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Confident You

Thank you so much for talking with us.

It is such a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate you, and thank you again for letting my dogs also have a part in the show. They enjoy being part of the pack here, so it has been fun.

Our animals need voices too.

That’s right, and they are noisy ones at best.

Thank you, everyone.

Thank you.

Bye, everyone. Go confidently.

Then hydrate.


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About Julie DeLucca

PSF 44 | Simple Habits

Founder, CEO, & Podcast Host at Go Confidently Services which is committed to helping women and small businesses grow and thrive by increasing confidence, transform lives, and gain clients.

She is certified as a Cognitive psychology-based techniques Coach who is passionate about helping women and organizations find success and is also the best-selling author of the newly released book Confident You (simple habits to live the life you’ve imagined).

Over the past 20 years, she has worked as a senior executive in the education industry and recently completed her tenure as Chief Innovation Officer for an academic solutions company based in New York City .

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